The Gantry Launchpad

Knight's Fork

Check out some of Jim Dunnigan's latest thoughts on the Islamofascist War.

I found this passage especially evocative:

Israel killed [Hamas leader]Khalil in response to a recent Hamas suicide bombing inside Israel. Offensive operations against Hamas in the Palestinian controlled West Bank and Gaza have stopped most terror attacks in Israel. And it has been found that the best way to really get a message to terrorist organization is to attack the senior leaders. Khalil was one of the most senior Hamas leaders living outside Israel. The attacks so angered Hamas that they quickly announced that they would now attack Israelis, and Jews, outside of Israel. This was quickly retracted, as such a move would make Hamas a major target for American anti-terrorist operations. The word has spread through terrorist organizations that the American led war on terror is indeed world wide, and can be particularly difficult to deal with if the anti-terror forces get on your case. Hamas has its hands full with the Israelis, and has no desire to take on American Special Forces and Delta Force, or British and Australian SAS. (emphasis added)

That was a brilliant Knight's Fork on the part of Israel; either Hamas sets itself up to get whacked by the Big Dogs, or they curl up their teeny l'il private parts and crawl on their bellies, back onto the porch.

They chose the porch. {snicker}

That really is too bad. I had this lovely storyboard, all planned out, just for the Big Whack:

[CAMERA ON] Hamas spokespigman: We will kill Joos everywhere! We will kill them in Israel, we will kill them, in their homes, we will kill them in Australia, Great Britain, and even in the United States!!

[CUT TO]{shot of huge shadow at spokespigman's feet, indicating large group of SF, SEALs, and SAS who are Not Amused, standing right behind him}

[CUE]spokespigman's spit-take realization that he's About To Die.

[DIALOG]{spokespigman}:ohshit. I'm gonna die.

[SFX]{add Wiley Coyote-style "dropping the hammer" here, then small, rising column of smoke}

Whoa, Nelly!

I've heard of the The Joy of Cooking, then later The Joy of Sex, but The Joy of Politics?

And what the heck is a Votergasm!?

You have to admire a site which encourages political activity via er, other activity, like Doing the Nasty on election night. Not to mention the disclaimers for the Votergasm pledge:

* Pledge-fulfilling sex must be consensual, legal, and generous. And safe. And hot.

* Acceptable sexual positions include, but are not limited to: missionary, doggy-style, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, leapfrog, butterfly, humpback whale, cling wrap, squashing of the deck chair, accordion, reverse piggy-back, advanced ("twin") leapfrog. Male-male, female-female, group, and oral variations of these positions can also be used to satisfy the pledge.

* Taking the pledge indicates a good-faith effort to abide by its provisions. Pledge-takers who have violated withholding provisions become effective non-voters, and are barred from sex with fellow pledge-takers.

* Pledge-takers who fail to vote are forbidden from masturbating. (Exemption: pledge-takers who are not eligible to vote are encouraged to masturbate frequently.)

* "Cybersex" does not satisfy the pledge, dorkwad.

* Non-voters may render themselves eligible for sex with American Heroes by voting at least twice in local, primary, and/or 2006 congressional races. Those voting in only one such race qualify to perform, but not receive, oral sex on American Heroes.

* Achievement of a Votergasm during election-night sex is probable, but not guaranteed. Those encountering difficulty reaching Votergasm are encouraged to slow things down, talk about it, and reduce the pressure. Other techniques include the use of massage oils, toys, "dirty talk," "ballot stuffing," and "exit polls."

* Per the U.S. Constitution, children conceived on election night are eligible for gigantic interest-free loans from the U.S. government, and special t-shirts.

Thanks to The Conspiracy to Keep You Poor and Stupid for the link.

Time...

...marches on, for all of us. Sometimes I think, "Damn, it's been three days since you blogged, fool!" Heh.

Ok. Right now I have to say "Happy 23rd Birthday" to the absolutely stunning, and always stylish Ambra Nykol.

Being a true gentleman, I would never point out that she's nearly one-third through her expected life span already; the numbers are even more embarassing for yours truly. :)

But, really, y'all should drop on over there and tell her "Happy Birthday." While you're at it, enjoy her new look, since she's finally started using Real Blogging Software^tm.

With young'ns like Ambra around, I'm perfectly confident that this country will be in good hands during my grey-haired years. Which, in my case, should be by the next week or two...

Tee hee.

Heee's Baaack...

For a while, now, one of the funniest bits of military humor to hit the 'net has been The 213 Things Skippy Is No Longer Allowed To Do In The U.S. Army. The original Skippy website, alas, had disappeared a while back, but the List kept bouncing around.

I have good news: Skippy's back! Apparently he never realized how popular his list had become; it was rather a shock to the poor boy. Heh.

Anyway, not only is the List back up, but he's now added a new page of things that his friends aren't allowed to do, either.

Run on over, and check it out.

It's alive, it's ALIVE!!!

Not too long ago, I wrote about the Great Melt-down.

At the time I was pretty upset, and was still getting depressed every time I thought about it; something I tried to avoid.

Just last week I bought Spinrite, since I had read that it could work miracles recovering data, but that application showed an emptry drive, too. The good news is that they have a 30-day money-back guarantee.

When I wrote to them about my problem, they explained that Spinrite is designed to recover data from bad sectors on damaged or flaky hard drives, not from a formatted or re-partitioned drive. It's a different approach. Their system depends on the current file table, so it wouldn't help me recover from a format.

But they did tell me about Ontrack Data Recovery. These folks provide data recovery solutions from single-user/"roll your own" to clean-room lab services. Apparently they are qualified to open the seal on a variety of hard drives (to recover the data) without invalidating the manufacturer's warranty. The list includes Fujitsu, Maxtor, Quantum, Seagate, and Western Digital. Impressive...

Ontrack allows you to download a demo version of their "personal" level of data recovery software for free. It will scan the selected drive, display any files or folders that seem to be recoverable, and allow you to flag those you wish to restore. It won't actually perform the restore, but it's useful to see if the software can even find your data.

I downloaded the demo, installed and ran it, and it saw my data! I thought about it for about 15 minutes, since the good stuff is $199; they have an $89 version ,but you can only restore 25 files at a time. Feh! I had several thousand files on that drive...

After that I spoke a silent prayer, bought the $199 package, downloaded and installed it.

Now, let's backtrack here. XP install had over-written the original FAT32 partition with an NTFS partition. Then I deleted that, and created a new FAT32 partition, and quick-formatted that. I hadn't written to the drive since (for which I give thanks!)

Even after all that mucking around, EasyRecovery^tm still found and recovered 98% of my data!!!

Alll my source code, all my papers, my memories; everything. I. Have. It. All. Back. I cannot describe just how ...happy isn't the word... I am.

The other 2%? some .MP3s, and a couple of vids. Nothing important. I think they had been deleted and overwritten before the mess, which would explain why they were damaged or cross-linked.

Anyway. If you ever find yourself in this situation, which -according to Ontrack- includes reformatted drives; do not walk; run to their website, and get their stuff. It's worth the money.

Ok, Ok, Firefox RULEZ! Happy now?

My good friend Dean Esmay has been pestering everyone to try Firefox. Now me, I prefer Mozilla, but that's like arguing about whether you prefer a 911 or a 920; they're both still Porches. :)

In any case, the Mozilla/Firefox people are trying to get the word out about their excellent new browser, so I took Dean's advice, and put a button up on the blog. YOu can see it quite clearly in the upper-left column.

No matter whether you like Firefox, or Mozilla, they're both head and shoulders above Internet Explorer. Faster, more features (like, skins or tabbed browsing), and -best of all- none of the huge security holes of Internet Explorer!!. Finally you can browse the web without worrying whether your browser will help a hostile hacker harass you!

Er, sorry about the alliteration. :)

Seriously. Go here. Check them out. You'll be glad you did.

P.S. Be patient. Looks like a lot of folks had the same idea I did... ;)

Just no hearings, please?

GOP Congressman Chris Cox has called for hearings about the actions of the CBS News division, and 60 Minutes II in particular, while publicizing the forged "Bush memos." In particular, Mr. Cox said that "despite the growing abundance of evidence that CBS News has aided and abetted fraud,'' CBS still refuses to divulge their source, or sources. (emphasis added)

Apparently Mr. Cox is upset by the idea that one of the major new organizations in this country (and the world) would stoop to fraud. Well, so am I.

The difference between us is that I think a Congressional investigation is exactly the wrong way to go about it. To my knowlege neither Congress, nor any other federal agency, has jurisdiction over the network's actions, unless the FCC fines Dan Rather for baring his chest on national TV.

And there goes my lunch...

On a more serious note: the investigation is a bad idea. Not only is there no legal precedent for such action, if held it would create a precedent of Congressional interference in reporting the news, and open the door for Federal harassment whenever a representative finds a story "suspect." Merely claim fraud, and pound the table.

I would suggest that if Representative Cox is that upset with CBS, he should file a civil suit in court.

Let's not compound the arrogant incompetance of the bungled forgeries with the absurd fatuity of Federal interference in yet one more part of our lives.

Um, ouch.

The articulate and quick-witted Ara Rubyan dropped by recently, and with tounge in cheek pointed out that Ms. Knox -former secretary to TexANG Lieutenant Colonel Jerry B. Killian- will be dismissed as a "leftist partisan hack," after she said that the statements in the forged memos were true, and asks

Will these Kerry campaign operatives stop at nothing?

Well, Ara, I hope they stop soon; they're making themselves look like fools. What y'all don't realize is that most normal human beings don't care about Kerry's Vietnam, or Bush's TexANG! I've heard it myself, over and over; even here in southwestern Ohio, in counties where I'm sure Bush will win comfortably a few weeks from now. They're tired of hearing about it.

And will you look at the latest exhibit? I have no doubt that Ms. Knox is a fine lady, and a decent human being -her opinion of the President notwithstanding ;) - but can anyone consider her statement as anything but hearsay, especially after thirty years? That she knew what her boss was thinking, even though said statement is directly contradicted by LT COL Killian's filed evaluations of Bush, as well as the testimony of Killian's wife and son?

I am sure that at this point the first reaction of the Kerry supports will be to retort "And the Swifties aren't relying on hearsay, eh?" No doubt in a sarcastic and skeptical tone. :)

Well, no, not really. The Swift Boat Veterans for Truth have made sworn affadavits as to what they saw and heard during their time with Kerry in Vietnam, which at the very least makes them liable for perjury charges; not to mention there's a great difference between one secretary testifying as to what she thinks her boss was thinking, and over 250 combat vets testifying as to what they experienced in combat.

Of course, part of the problem is that these testimonies contradict each other; Hell, Kerry contradicts himself more than once! But that's the problem. Don Sensing, the same fellow I quoted in my original post, wrote an article about the ...fragility... of memory in combat. A classmate of his spent time in Iraq during the Gulf War, and was surprised at the variety of recollections of a particular fight written down just a few days later; is it any wonder there's disagreement about something that happened 35 years ago?

I'm thinking -if I can get the energy up- of writing an article on how neither side has introduced much in the way of irrefutable fact during the "Great Vietnam Debate." As best I can tell, 99% boils down to he said/she said/they said. You picks your memories, and you takes your choice.

Point being here that the Kerry supporters are flailing away at a an equine that's not only dead, but bled, butchered, and sold by the pound at the local grocery store.

Dobbin-burgers, anyone?

Winner for "Best Scandal Title is..." II

We have another winner!

The piquant and picturesque Rachel Lucas certainly coined one:

The Revolution Will Be Blogged

9/11 Memorial

Ok. It's a day late. I had trouble getting on, Saturday.

I think Stephen Vincent Benet did an excellent summary of what we're up against in his poem Litany for Dictatorships.

Try reading it out loud, remembering the men and women in New York who fell a thousand feet, rather than burn; the businessmen in Iraq with amputated hands; the people in Afghanistan stoned to death under the Taliban; the mass graves and childrens prisons in Iraq; the teenaged girl hung in Iran for "disrespecting" a judge.

Remember.

Litany for Dictatorships

-Stephen Vincent Benet

For all those beaten, for the broken heads,
The fosterless, the simple, the oppressed,
The ghosts in the burning city of our time?

For those taken in rapid cars to the house and beaten
By the skillful boys with the rubber fists,
-Held down and beaten, the table cutting the loins
Or kicked in the groin and left, with the muscles jerking
Like a headless hen's on the floor of the slaughter-house
While they brought the next man in with his white eyes staring.
For those who still said "Red Front" or "God save the Crown!"
And for those who were not courageous
But were beaten nevertheless.
For those who spit out the bloody stumps of their teeth
Quietly in the hall,
Sleep well on stone or iron, watch for the time
And kill the guard in the privy before they die,
Those with the deep-socketed eyes and the lamp burning.

For those who carry the scars, who walk lame - for those
Whose nameless graves are made in the prison-yard
And the earth smoothed back before the morning and the lime scattered.

For those slain at once.
For those living through the months and years
Enduring, watching, hoping, going each day
To the work or the queue for meat or the secret club,
Living meanwhile, begetting children, smuggling guns,
And found and killed at the end like rats in a drain.

For those escaping
Incredibly into exile and wandering there.
For those who live in the small rooms of foreign cities
And who yet think of the country, the long green grass,
The childhood voices, the language, the way wind smelt then,
The shape of rooms, the coffee drunk at the table,
The talk with friends, the loved city, the waiter's face,
The gravestones, with the name, where they will not lie
Nor in any of that earth.
Their children are strangers.

For those who planned and were leaders and were beaten
And for those, humble and stupid, who had no plan
But were denounced, but were angry, but told a joke,
But could not explain, but were sent away to the camp,
But had their bodies shipped back in the sealed coffins,
"Died of pneumonia." "Died trying to escape."

For those growers of wheat who were shot by their own wheat-stacks,
For those growers of bread who were sent to the ice-locked wastes.
And their flesh remembers the fields.

For those denounced by their smug, horrible children
For a peppermint-star and the praise of the Perfect State,
For all those strangled, gelded or merely starved
To make perfect states; for the priest hanged in his cassock,
The Jew with his chest crushed in and his eyes dying,
The revolutionist lynched by the private guards
To make perfect states, in the names of the perfect states.

For those betrayed by the neigbours they shook hands with
And for the traitors, sitting in the hard chair
With the loose sweat crawling their hair and their fingers restless
As they tell the street and the house and the man's name.
And for those sitting at the table in the house
With the lamp lit and the plates and the smell of food,
Talking so quietly; when they hear the cars
And the knock at the door, and they look at each other quickly
And the woman goes to the door with a stiff face,
Smoothing her dress.
"We are all good citizens here. We believe in the Perfect State."

And that was the last time Tony or Karl or Shorty came to the house
And the family was liquidated later.
It was the last time.
We heard the shots in the night
But nobody knew next day what the trouble was
And a man must go to his work.
So I didn't see him
For three days, then, and me near out of my mind
And all the patrols on the streets with their dirty guns
And when he came back, he looked drunk, and the blood was on him.

For the women who mourn their dead in the secret night,
For the children taught to keep quiet, the old children,
The children spat-on at school.
For the wrecked laboratory,
The gutted house, the dunged picture, the pissed-in well
The naked corpse of Knowledge flung in the square
And no man lifting a hand and no man speaking.

For the cold of the pistol-butt and the bullet's heat,
For the ropes that choke, the manacles that bind,
The huge voice, metal, that lies from a thousand tubes
And the stuttering machine-gun that answers all.

For the man crucified on the crossed machine guns
Without name, without ressurection, without stars,
His dark head heavy with death and his flesh long sour
With the smell of his many prisons - John Smith, John Doe,
John Nobody - oh, crack your mind for his name!
Faceless as water, naked as the dust,
Dishonored as the earth the gas-shells poison
And barbarous with portent.
This is he.
This is the man they ate at the green table
Putting their gloves on ere they touched the meat.
This is the fruit of war, the fruit of peace,
The ripeness of invention, the new lamb,
The answer to the wisdom of the wise.
And still he hangs, and still he will not die
And still, on the steel city of our years
The light falls and the terrible blood streams down.

We thought we were done with these things but we were wrong.
We thought, because we had power, we had wisdom.
We thought the long train would run to the end of Time.
We thought the light would increase.
Now the long train stands derailed and the bandits loot it.
Now the boar and the asp have power in our time.
Now the night rolls back on the West and the night is solid.
Our fathers and ourselves sowed dragon's teeth.

Our children know and suffer the armed men.

Winner for "Best Scandal Title is..."

The Puppy Blender, of course! Glenn Reynolds has decided to call this scandal:

Ra^therGate

The sharp knives are out!

Don Sensing has posted some excellent articles on the forged TANG memos, but his most recent to date has raised an interesting point I haven't seen before:

...the mainline media are now going to be very wary of dirt slung by the Kerry camp because CBS was so badly hoodwinked by the Kerry campaign. One thing I learned about the news media in my years of media relations management: when they turn on you, they use sharp knives. Kerry's camp has committed an unpardonable sin: it has made them look like fools.

Given that, his conclusion that "The Dems' campaign strategy is dead and buried" is spot-on. And where does that leave Kerry for the next seven weeks?

News alert: political candidate missing!

Just caught this at Llamabutchers:

Is there nothing we can do to help this poor man?

Well, that settles it!

Run on over to the Kerry Spot, and scroll on down to the [09/10 02:04 PM] Entry:

"MCAULIFFE BLAMES ROVE FOR CBS DOCUMENTS

From the Washington Times:

Democratic National Committee Chairman Terry McAuliffe today said neither his organization nor John Kerry´s campaign leaked to CBS documents questioning President Bush´s service record, which may have been forged.

He suggested White House adviser Karl Rove could be behind the documents.

"I can unequivocally say that no one involved here at the Democratic National Committee had anything at all to do with any of those documents. If I were an aspiring young journalist, I think I would ask Karl Rove that question," Mr. McAuliffe said.

Christ on a Crutch! McAuliffe has finally jumped the shark!

Ladies and Gentlemen, we can now summarize the Democratic Party Platform in one sentance:

Bush lied, and Rove planned it!

Man bites dog...

There's an old newspaper saying: "'Dog bites man' isn't news; 'Man bites dog;' that's news!"

But, what about 'Dog shoots man?"

Apparently Jerry Allen (AKA "Sick Bastich") of Pensacola, FL, had seven puppies for which he couldn't find homes. He did what any normal American would do: decided to shoot them.

But one puppy had other plans.... "Psycho" Allen had a puppy in each hand, both of whom squirmed, well, like puppies. One of the little bravehearts managed to get his paw on the trigger, and shot the worthless turd Allen through the wrist.

Too bad our little friend wasn't big enough to aim between the eyes...

Thanks to the creative and brilliant ronin, Frank J for the original link!

Um, ouch...

After the Great Meltdown of '04, I lost a lot of links to terrific places.

One of those places was the Dissident Frogman, one of my favorite amphibians! I finally made some time to drop by and I found the Big Red Button.

WARNING: press the Big Red Button at your own risk!! You Have Been Warned...

He's just resting...

Oh. My. GOD.

-step 1: cover keyboard and monitor.
-step 2: remove all spillable drinks from computer area.
-step 3: Read this. (WARNING: probably not work safe if your boss doesn't have a sense of humor!)

What's really funny is that it's dead-on accurate...

Thanks to Don Sensing for the link!

UPDATE: I suppose I should explain that, if you don't "get" Monty Python, you probably won't get the joke... :)

Kerry reveals new strategy

Spin like Hell...

In the very latest fatuity from the sinking ship known as the Kerry campaign, Senator Waffles now says that the Iraq war was the "he wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time." The Rueters story also quotes Kerry's earlier statement that

he would have voted to give Bush the authority to use force if necessary against Saddam Hussein even if he had known at the time that the Iraqi leader had no weapons of mass destruction

The man just can't make up his mind. By the way, if the above quote sounds familiar, it should; it was a popular way to describe the Vietnam War. I can see that Mr. Kerry is maintaining his repuation for "nuance."

Thanks to Greyhawk over at the Mudville Gazette for the link; I was going to comment on that quote but he beat me to it! While you're at it, why not drop by the Gazette, and drop something in the tip jar? The 'Hawk could use the help, and I'd hate to lose a fine commenter.

What is the American Dream?

The lovely and talented Ambra Nykol, recovering from a five-state whirlwind tour, is doing some R&R in Connecticut.

While recharging her reserves, Ambra asked several good questions. For one of them I can't resist an answer:
Someone please clarify this "American Dream" for me if you will. That's a phrase tossed around rather loosely these days.

It's very simple, my dear. I'll let Arnold give my answer:

To think that a once-scrawny boy from Austria could grow up to become governor of the state of California and then stand here...

... then stand here in Madison Square Garden and speak on behalf of the president of the United States -- that is an immigrant's dream.

It is the American dream.

...

We are still the lamp lighting the world, especially those who struggle. No matter in what labor camp they slave, no matter in what injustice they're trapped, they hear our call. They see our light. And they feel the pull of our freedom.

They come here, as I did, because they believe -- they believe in us. They come because their hearts say to them, as mine did, "If only I can get to America." You know, someone once wrote, "There are those who say that freedom is nothing but a dream." They are right. It's the American dream.

Smackdown!

Just cruised on by the VodkaPundit, where he put up a link to the Zell Miller interview on Hardball after his speech.

My analysis: Damn! Miller is a real bulldog. He got right back in Mathews' face and didn't back down. Ya gotta love it!

My favorite part: where Miller said he wished he could still challenge Matthews to a duel.

I just wish I had the disk space to put it up here. Anyway, run on over there, and enjoy the show.

UPDATE: Captain Ed of Captain's Quarters has a link to the transcript , and shares his thoughts on the exchange.